Finally, school is done. No more school for me, unless I chose to go to college. No more going back to that horrible high school. Today is my first day of freedom, my first day of Summer! Whoo Hoo!
Today, I had to go and bring Jessica her yearbook at the school. The rest of them are having graduation practice, and of course, I'm not invited. But anyway, Mrs. Hein gave me this letter. I wrote it to myself four years ago, on my first day of Freashman year. I forgot all about doing that. I'll type up what I wrote to myself:
Dear Nikka,
Hey there. Big senior now, huh? Well, I'm proud of you. And I'm so glad that you were able to make it this far. I'm sure mom would be proud of you, because I know I am.
Well, I guess I should start out with my weight height, and such. Right now I weigh 191 lbs, and my height is 5' 6". My eye color is sunburst brown, and I have glasses. (I hope to have contacts in the near future) My hair has been pink and black, black, blonde, and red and black. Right now it is brown, but I'm thinking of dyeing it to black again or maybe even pink and black in the near future. I have a ring-which I hope you still have- that signifies my abstinence from sexual activities and reminds me of my promise to myself never to hurt the other person. It is on my left hand, middle finger. I pray that I still have it: it means so much to me right now.
My best friend in the entire world is Elizabeth Ellen Radzinski, or Akii Lee Rainsoul in a lot of my stories. I have enclosed some of them, but not all. Just the two that I have been working on lately. My other friends are Justin McClure, Terry McClure, Kayla Meeker, Linda Maxam, Amanda Brandow (I think) Tomas Tarndroff, Eric Harms, Charles, David, Victor, Casey, and Jon Draper.
Jon, actually, is my ex boyfriend. He and I are still friends, and I regret it every day that we separated over something so stupid as my promise to my other friends. I still care a lot about him, though. But currently I find myself in a relationship with Benji Taylor, an 18-year-old from England. He wants to come and live with me, but I'm not sure how that's going to work out.
Eric Harms is another story. He and I have known eachother for the past seven months, and just recently I have had the guts to tell him the truth about me. He surprisingly wasnt that mad at me and I hope that he and I can become closer.
Only here am I going to admit my self that I have a crush on Terry McClure. He's a senior so I'm probably never going to have a serious relationship with him, but I'm glad to call him one of my closest friends.
My group of friends contsists of all of the above, but the ones I hag out with frequently are April Turenne, Terry, Justin, and Lizz. We hang out all the time and we are called the "Goths" of the school. April, she and I arn't really that close, but I hope that we can become closer.
Right now we are going through the gbattle with dad for custody of us. Grandma is suposedly going to be getting permantant custody us us by next March. I hope it goes through; I hate my dad, and I dont want to have anything to do with him. Reminder to myself: Dont invite him to graduation. He'll just disapoint you more than ever.
This is just one of those things I really look forward to in teh future. Being in a healthy relationship with someoneI love. Maybe it will be Benji, maybe it will be someone else. But for now, though, I'm glad I have the knowledge to help others in their own paths to true love. Right now as I write this letter, there are so many things going through my mind about how you are. Are you and Elizabeth still friends? Are you still talking to Eric, or Jon? Did Grandma finally let you have your own pet for company? How did getting a license go? So many questions, so few answers. But I am very paitent, and I am very, very proud of you.
You are a part of me as I am a part of you, so follow my advice, and stay true to your own path. Don't let anyone else tell you what you can and cannot do, Nikka. Because otherwise, you wont turn out to be me. You'll turn out to be someone you're not; the puppet of everyone else's life. Its happened, I'm ruse you can remember it. More than once you've fallen from your road and into someone else's life, and you became what they wanted you to be. Ther eis nothing else I can give you, my friend. And I look forward to the time when we finally cross paths, and the wounds of life are sealed forever.
Love always and forever,
Nikka Regina
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